I read somewhere recently, an article giving advice on what to say in certain situations which we may find difficult.

Here are a few of them:

1 It all sounds logical but my feelings suggest something else. (Sometimes convincing arguments are not valid.)

2 I've just realised this topic doesn't interest me. (Better to be real and honest for a moment than to fake interest and regret it for a long time.)

3 I'm sorry if I gave you the impression that you could talk to me like that. (Very useful. It starts like an apology and ends with a boundary.) 

4 Giving my best only makes sense if you give your best. (This can be a wake up call.)

There are other nuggets which apply to relationship break ups and work situations.

I can copy the whole list to Caroline if you like. I took photos of the list so the copy isn't very neat in appearance but it's all there!

I like 1 and 2. My OH is very logical and can't understand much of the time, how I feel. He tries and I understand where he's coming from I really do. This statement… No 1 seemed to make sense to him though. It just shows the positive effect words in the right order can have.

No 2. I can only say this to someone I'm close to like my OH. And I've said it to him! It worked. He knows now that I'm just not interested in certain topics that thrill him. I'm sure he's not interested in things I obsessed about. In fact I know he's not, but he doesn't tell me. He switches off.

I think learning the right words to say in certain situations can be very helpful.

Julia 

A Moodscope Member